Disability Pride Month: Let’s Celebrate

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to see it, is it still disabled? This classic question sums up the conflicts many seem to face when confronted with invisible disabilities.

Lockdown really shone a light on this for me. It was honestly the most social I’ve ever been. Meet ups were short, virtual, and I didn’t have to get out of bed. No one else was doing anything so my lack of news wasn’t even awkward - it was expected. When everyone started going back to their normal lives it was obviously great, but it did leave me with a clear picture of just how different my reality was to theirs, and how few people really understood this.

I hadn’t appreciated until then how much I hide my illness from others. I’d much rather smile and laugh with someone than whinge or complain but my sunny and upbeat disposition has come at a price. People really have no idea what’s going on. More than this, the things that I’m most proud of: my drive and stoicism; are often not simply overlooked, but thought to be the opposite, with people assuming that I’m lazy or making up excuses.

It’s a difficult line to tread, as anyone with an invisible illness will attest. It is often the case that if it can’t be seen it can be difficult to comprehend. To this extent many have given me puzzled, if not mistrusting, looks when I pull out my blue badge. Even those that try to understand can find it hard to assimilate a smiley, happy person with the reality of just how much energy goes into appearing ‘semi-functional’, let alone how ill someone may be feeling whilst they are doing so.

Due to the somewhat ‘invisible’ nature of my condition I have sometimes felt like I’ve been expected to justify my use of the term disabled. However, no one within the disabled community has ever made me feel this way. Disability is a term which covers all manners of conditions which stray from what people consider ‘the norm’ and amongst this diverse group I have found a strong, inclusive and accepting community.

So this is my attempt at being more open and a thank you to the communities that have made me feel seen. I am disabled and I am a wheelchair user with an invisible chronic illness (although my often gaunt, spaced expression does tend to make that illness a little visible at least).

Much like my degree in physics, I expect that my chronic health issues will continue to be something of a conversation stopper. Whilst it’s disability pride month though, I can think of no better time to attempt to start a conversation about it so please: comment, like, get in touch or whatever. Let’s bring a little visibility to the invisible.

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